i write words of love, yet i have not loved
how can i be writing things which i have not felt ?!
could it be that i have indeed loved, once, without even knowing
could it be, that my hate and resentment, was once love, so long time ago ??

if i have not loved, how can i hate ?!
how can one know sadness without knowing what happiness is ??
if i have not loved, than what is this i feel
whenever i see this shadow in my dreams
even now, i still see him, passing through every corner of my dreams
those feelings beyond what words can say
those feelings, only felt when i'm in my dreams
so real, yet so unreal...
for i can no longer tell a dream from the real world
when i'm seeing him even with eyes wide open

juz a shadow lingering by my side
he is my only sanity, reminding me hate is not all i have
even when noone else knows that he's there, he's there
even if noone belives he's there, he's there
by my side, even when i'm awake
to remind me that even if the whole world hates me now
at least i'll have 1 person who i can turn to
and trust that he, and only he, will not betray me
as we are one and the same..
he is my madness, and my sanity
the part of myself where i retreat to when seeking peace
the part i retreat to when i need a solitary place

yes, i think i've loved, and am still loving
but the object of my love and hatred may not be what i thought to be
it's no the world, or other people, which i loved or hated
it was me, myself all along, all these times
it's juz me, myself, in a world of my own

in this
Ever Changing
environment

people
wif their ever Changing
Hearts

Bonds,
& Feelings
which remains
the same
(through time and space)

has become
so rare,
so precious

beauty of the sakura tree (part 1)

a single Cherry Blossom tree

blossoms

in a mid afternoon

in a solitary place

a place where noone has ever been to

However Beautiful,

However Macnificent

However Alluring

noone will ever know

for noone has seen it's beauty

for noone knows it exist...

......................................

gtg~

have another "visual" poetry to post..
but i really need to sleep now..><
so see if i'm able o wake slightly early to post it....
if not than gotta wait till my off day, thur to upload it..;p
nitez..^^

pls stay, don't go
at least for the nite,
stay wif me, stay by my side
don't leave,
don't go.. ...

it's not tat i'm afraid of the dark
i juz don't like to b alone

but if u really must leave
than leave,
go,
to where your heart desire to be
i will not hold u back
Go..be by her side,
and hold her hands through the nite
she needs u more than i do
for she is frighten of the dark
while i...?
i juz don' t like to be alone

terri-kay
7/12/09

..."darkness is all that is left in this broken paradise"...

..."emptiness is all there is to this meanless life"...

..."so what is there to this gal you see,
who is sweet while being gothic and emo at the same time...
who is in search of meaning to life & death"...

..."what awits us in the life after death,
is it the the blinding lights & peacful aura of heavens,
and GOD's welcome wif open arms...
the hells raging fire & cries of thousands suffering souls,
and SATAN's welcome wif spear & whip in his hands, an evil smile,
and a pot of boiling oil behind him"...

..."or juz plain nothingness, neither God nor Satan awaits...
only your soul, drifting, wondering aimlessly,
the vast world of pure emptyness"...